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Why Doesn't my boyfriend want to have sex with me anymore?

By May 19, 2009 - 9:46am
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We've been dating for over a yer now but in the last few months our sex has drastically decreased at first started to go down from at least 1-2 times a day for at least 5 months and then it went down to 1-2 times a week and then to 1-2 times a month and now it's been a month and a half since we've had sex. I've read a few articles about this allready, but none seem to fit my problem exactly. I was worried for a while that it might be me that was the problem and but he told me it wasn't and i know he wouldn't lie to me. I've asked him about it but he says theres nothing wrong. I just don't know what to do anymore. He's only a year older than me and he's suppose to be in hes prime. Is there anything I can do? I Haven't pressured him or anything because I dont want him to do it just to shut me up. I want him to want to. and I'm just not satistied anymore and im not asking for everyday, at this point once or twice a week would be nice. A far as I know there's nothing he's stressed about at work or school, could it be a cobination of the 2? or something else going on that I don't know about? and please keep in mind that im am searching for help and advice and I don't want to hear find a new boyfriend. I love him and im not leaving him, even if it means were not going to have sex anymore. But it's frustration for the time being as I find it a tad odd that I want it more than he does. and I don't really want to talk to any of my friends abotu it because I live in a small town and this is personal and I don't need everyone talking about it. and the last thing I want him to feel is embarassed. I havn't told anyone of my friends but I'm in need of some advice. Any Ideas?

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Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

This is an old post but I am a guy who does not want sex with his girlfriend. I am not cheating just don't get to the point were I want to. I think its a mix of things, like work and the stress of life, but also I think we are not in sink with each other. When I do have disire she does not and likewise when she wants I don't. We have been together 5 years and it is hard to talk about but we did and we will not push it for now and just go to that level unless we both are in the mood.

September 22, 2011 - 1:01pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

this is rubbish. just because something changed doesnt mean he's cheating. you may just have some moral issues you need to resolve don't go around giving bad advice because of your own issues.

May 7, 2011 - 6:30pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

okay im a male....just because a man doesnt want to hae sex doesnt mean he's cheating thats stereotypical and bs....maybe hes going through changes....dont listen to her girl...just cuz her bf ound someone better in the sack doesnt mean all men chet when they dont have sex with their girlfriend...maybe try something to spice it up...and maybe he really does just need time...

April 21, 2011 - 9:51pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

Not true in ALL situations. MAYBE HE DID OR MAYBE HE DIDN'T! Men are (although clearly different) human and crave the same emotional and physical connections women do (although to different degrees depending on the individual and their sex). EVERYONE'S SITUATION IS DIFFERENT (For instance..my ex-boyfriend did not physically cheat but had/has a pornographic addiction) which is why we have empower HER!

February 17, 2011 - 11:06pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

i have to disagree with you. im a guy and im in a relationship and im not a physical guy so i dont pursue sex actively with my girlfriend. its not a strange thing for a guy to do. for anyone who has this problem just sit down and talk to them. if he says he needs time, then alot is going on with him right now and he need to to figure it out. he will make sure everything is taken care of relationship wise ( maybe, if he can handle it) What yall can do in the mean time is just remain open and supportive. it will work out if it is supposed to.

February 6, 2011 - 9:15am
(reply to Anonymous)

i do read through discussion boards a lot when i have questions and i don't think i have ever seen a reply where i felt the need to comment on how horrible it was. You might not even see this but i will feel better. even though this was a while ago and i am sorry you went through that, but i am appalled at your response. I hope whoever this was realized that you are a horribly bitter person. why would you want to make someone else hurt like you did and any friend you have should know not to listen to you in the future!

January 26, 2011 - 8:36pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

my boyfriend n i havnt had sex for a month n im so worried , he has cheated on me before n i foun out from a friend that he did n im starting to think maybe he did it again i need help ??

December 20, 2010 - 2:13am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

That is not always true... My boyfriend and I had the same problem at our one year.. but now it's going on two years and we have gotten so much better.. Sometimes their are stumps in a relationship.. Sometimes it's better just to work through it. Don't scare the poor girl.

November 23, 2010 - 12:56am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

I had went through the same thing 2 yrs ago and yeah he cheated, that's what it was too. So I think he is cheat as well.

September 28, 2010 - 8:02am
(reply to Anonymous)

omg I am going trough the same thing.. If you are not can you tell me whaa you did..

September 10, 2010 - 2:27pm
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