It's normal for siblings to fight over everything and anything. Identify the triggers and deal with them and enjoy a quieter life.
Watch any young primates at play and you'll see lots of rough and tumble. It's harmless. Boys in particular enjoy this kind of play. Unless you judge they are likely to hurt themselves, let them get on with it. If the noise drives you crazy, find yourself a quiet place or send them outside.
They are now getting bigger and stronger than they realise. Horseplay of this type can sometimes get out of hand and turn to 'real' fighting. If you're not sure if it's real fighting or a game, check it out by asking 'Is this a play-fight or is it real?' Play-fights can sometimes be disguised bullying. Parents may dismiss it as just fun but to the poor child who is getting hammered it's anything but!
Tired and irritable?
Do they seem to fight more at the end of the day, when they are tired and irritable? If so, plan evening activities to help them wind down. Watching television, (avoid violent and aggressive programmes) playing on a computer or listening to music are all suitable low-key activities.
Why do they fight?
Deal with the things that cause the most persistent fights. If it's about possessions, make them establish rules about sharing. If it's about space, let them divide their shared space in an agreed way. Don't you introduce the rules make them work it out for themselves. That way they are more likely to stick to it.
Be firm
Parents need some time to themselves at the end of the day. Be firm that once he is in bed, he stays there. If he comes down, take his hand and lead him back to bed without saying anything. If he comes down again, repeat the procedure. It is important that your son understands that you need time for yourself.
Chemistry
Between brothers and sisters, there are sometimes personality clashes that make it difficult for them to get along together. You can't alter the way they react to each other but explain how disturbing it is for the rest of the family. Tell them the rest of the family want a quiet life. Ask them to sort out their disagreements and agree a workable compromise. You may have to act as referee at first but eventually you should be able to trust them to do it on their own.
You're not the boss!
Older children come to assume that they have certain rights, because of their age. They may like to boss the younger child and be the leader at everything. This works fine with an easy-going younger sibling or if there is a large age gap. With a small age gap or a more assertive child, the older child's supremacy will be challenged, sometimes with fists.
All user-generated information on this site is the opinion of its author only and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment for any medical conditions. Members and guests are responsible for their own posts and the potential consequences of those posts detailed in our Terms of Service.
Add a Comment1 Comments
Thank you for this Share.
April 3, 2018 - 3:40amSusan
This Comment