Another night of little rest…maybe because we went to bed too early and I took several naps today. I have been having a hard time staying asleep during the night. It’s really annoying.
I have been nauseous again the past couple of days. It is the strangest thing. I was feeling great during the time that Christine was here. We were running errands all around town and I was walking everywhere. Then Tuesday I started feeling a little sick when I dropped her off at the airport. Today I felt sick again and even threw up mid morning. This is the first time that I have actually thrown up since the first round of Taxotere. I’m not sure why all of the sudden I am feeling sick again. I thought at first it was because I ran out of the patches that go behind the ear to help with motion sickness. I was able to pick them up at CTCA yesterday and started wearing it immediately…I haven’t noticed any drastic change. I have also been wearing the sea-bands that go on the wrist, as well as taking Zofran (anti-nausea medicine). I guess at least this time I feel like it’s worth something. Now I know it is because the chemo is super toxic and it is killing the cancer cells! This taxotere is some nasty stuff though. I can’t wait to be done with chemo someday. It is just so rough! Sometimes I feel like the side effects are not manageable. They certainly have affected my lifestyle. I feel restricted sometimes by the chemo because I never know what to expect and how I am going to feel. Everyday is a gamble. Even sometimes the day of, I feel different hour by hour. It makes it super difficult to plan anything.
I spent a good amount of time on the phone tonight talking with my friend in Chicago, Sean Kelly. It was good catching up with him. I miss hanging out with him sometimes. We have always gotten along and had some good times being each others “back up dates”. I can’t believe I still have yet to go to Chicago! I am hoping maybe this spring I can make it out there. It sounds like a blast and I have several girlfriends that are actually from Chicago that I know would love to go back and show me around. Of course, this is all IF I can make it on the plane by next year. I still have yet to travel by air. I have only been out of town twice this entire year and both times we drove. I am definitely starting to feel a little landlocked and batty from not being able to travel as frequently as I would like. I am just praying that I feel better soon and long enough to take a couple of days and get out of town. There are so many places I really want to go. We still are planning on going to New Zealand early next year. I would love to go to France and Spain sometime soon. I was thinking these may be a great alternative to the “beach vacation."
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Hi Melissa -
It's good to hear from you again. I'm glad you got to spend time talking with your friend Sean. I've found that being able to do something that was fun prior to living with cancer is helpful in getting through those days that are like yo yo's and part of the new journey.
I can also appreciate feeling landlocked. Sometimes when I feel that way I take an imaginary trip on the Internet and try to virtually visit places that are on my wish list. Perhaps you would also enjoy something like that.
I love your spirit of adventure, and look forward to hearing from you when you go to Chicago AND to New Zealand. In the meantime, stay strong and please keep in touch.
Take good care,
October 19, 2009 - 5:49pmPat
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