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Sex and relationship

By March 25, 2011 - 10:29am
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My husband and I have sex only about once a week and sometimes twice/week but only if I'm in luck, and mostly it is me asking for it. I saw him masturbates in the shower in the morning. He thought I was still sleeping. He knows I'm always available. That makes me angry and I feel insulted. When it happens, I remain very quiet and he was wondering why I was upset for no reason (he did not know I saw him). By the way, we were married for almost 25 years. Also, there's always little semen that comes out from him if he has an orgasm. I also am not sure if he had orgasm after we made love because usually if he ejaculate, it comes out from me after only sometimes, but most of the time i am dry.He's 47 years old.

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EmpowHER Guest

Hi again Janette and thank you for providing more information. I will agree with onlyoneme and say asking your daughter to check up on your husband (her father) is not a good idea. I think your main concern here is cheating since this has been the main topic of your second post. The first option is to sit him down and plainly ask him and voice your concerns. It appears that you two have a great marriage after 25 years.

I think snooping around will only cause distrust in your relationship. Ask him, see what he says.

Keep us posted!

March 26, 2011 - 9:52am
EmpowHER Guest

Dearest Janette,

Darling, if you are still having sex one to two times a week after 25 years of marriage, you two are really abnormal as we see so many women asking this same question of their men in their early 20s. We should be asking you, HOW HAVE YOU TWO DONE IT SO LONG?

Since this is a new one for me, I want to get some more information from you. Does he have any arousal problems? Do you consider cheating a possibility? Would you consider him to be stressed or depressed? Thank you for any additional information that you can provide.


March 25, 2011 - 11:14am
(reply to Anonymous)

No, he does not have arousal problems; he's not depressed, but sometimes he's stressed. About cheating? I don't know. He's home almost all the time except when he has some emergency at work, he's late just for a couple of hours, and he calls if he's late always. One time about two months ago, he left really early because he said he can't sleep and he did not want to go back to bed or else by the time he goes back to sleep, it's time to get up. He works in an oil field. He's gas operator. I told him that time it was really weird that he'll leave that early. I told him that was he going to someone's house or apartment? He answered me, "Don't be stupid." When he got to work, he called me. He said either he'll stay in his little office or he'll stay inside his company truck and watch the snow fall. We live in Bakersfield, CA and snow is a rare occassion. I don't know. Sometimes I have suspicions he's cheating, but I can't prove anything because on weekends he's always home except when it is his turn to work weekends. They have rotating weekend schedules once a month. What's bad is the company provides them cell phones so I could not tell if some woman calls him or text him. When he talks on his phone, it's always someone from work needed help for gas leaks, gas pressure, etc.. I've never seen him text because I know he has no patience for that, and one thing, I don't know how to check his text message. I was gonna ask our daughter to check his phone if his phone is in our bedroom or bathroom. Maybe I will have to do that. There are other women who writes to him on his email, but it was in junk section. They said he saw his profile and they like it. I am triying to look for that site but I can't find it. It really makes me not sure because he says he loves me and he's fortunate to have me as his wife, and there's none like me.

March 25, 2011 - 1:38pm
(reply to Janette)

Hello Janette,

I read both your post and i did think off the back wow! something is going on.As of the cheating...maybe...but i do not think it is a good choice to get your daughter invovled and to search her fathers text messages.I dont want you to go looking and you find something that you cant handle.Either let the dark come to light or take the risk of finding out something that might tear you up inside.As of the emailes what site is it?

March 25, 2011 - 1:56pm
(reply to onlyoneme)

That is what i am so desperate to know, I have no idea what site. There are hundredths of those. He admitted last year he went to CA singles,but just to look at girls only one time. What I did was went to any site and fill out something so they will match me with his profile but no luck. How I wish I know that dating site. I want to know what he wrote about himself.

March 25, 2011 - 4:03pm
(reply to Janette)

As women to women,and wife to wife..Am so sorry that you have to go through this.I wish u the best of luck in your marriage.

March 25, 2011 - 9:50pm
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