My boyfriend never seems sexually interested in me anymore

By anonymous54321 December 1, 2018 - 7:43am

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I have been going out with my boyfriend for almost a year now and we were best mates for 3 years beforehand. When we began going out the only real change to our relationship was the intimacy and sexual side of it, as we are still best mates now, this was incredibly passionate and was a reflection of how close we were on a level which is more than just physical. We both love eachother completely. However for a while now (a few months) he hasn't initiated sex with me or anything sexual, I always initiate it. I only see him a few times a week at most and that means we can only have sex then, but even when it comes to seeing eachother he doesn't try to initiate sexual intimacy. I know however that he does masturbate though, but he doesn't tell me, never sexts me anymore and blanks me when I try to be flirty. It has just left me feeling rejected and sad all the time, as sexual intimacy is something I really valued with him and it was so passionate. We are both only 18, so work/age isn't really a problem, but haven't had sex for over 2 weeks now (this is a regular occurence). I have spoken to him about it gently several times and he says he is still sexually attracted to me. However, he never makes the effort to initiate sex or plan anything romantic, and if I don't initiate it, it never happens. We haven't even been going out for a year but my self esteem has fallen, confidence and it just leaves me feeling very sad. I'm not sure what to do.

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Helena Guide

Hello, anonymous54321

Thank you for writing today!

I'm not sure what else you can do if he is not willing to tell you what has changed for him. Try to broach the subject again, calmly. Let him know you love him and that, while certainly, sex is not the all of any relationship, it an important part, and you miss that part of the relationship with him.

You are both young. Perhaps, (for him) the relationship has run its course. You don't have to stay in any relationship that is not satisfying to you or making you happy. So keep this mind.

best.

Helena

December 1, 2018 - 11:59am