I have lived with anxiety all of my life. From when I was a child, My single mother, and my grandmother, who moved in with us after my father died, to now at the age of 46. Anxiety and Depression has always been a problem in our family. All of us at home suffer from Anxiety and Depression. Unfortunately, my children, and my sister's children also suffer from Anxiety and Depression (which is common in families where a parent suffer from this ailment. It is transfered to the children). Everything we have done has been involved around anxiety so this is how we cope with our problems. I have tried one-on-one therapy, medication, and meditation. My anxiety has become more accute, since I was raised by a mother who had a lot of mental issues (bipolarism, depression and anxiety). And thus was abusive physically, and emotionally. I never felt that I was good enough. I felt that I could never please her. And with her bipolarism, we all had to walk on egg shells, especially me. She was more focused on me, thus caused me more anxiety.. Well then I married my mother!. My husband of 24 years was very emotionally draining, since he too was an emotional abuser, and gave me plenty of emotional detachment, and abandonment to make it worse. As a consequence of my problems with my husband and his emotional detachments I started eating to feed the heart.. I am now obese and I hate myself! As mentioned earlier, my stress, anxiety, and depression have become acute throughout the years. I take medication for it but it has'nt rid of it in its entirety. My children are adults and as the Anxiety, and Worry Wort that I am, I stayed pretty anxious and tense throughout their upbringing, because this is how my mother was with us. As they became adults and started their own lives away from me it became horrible to think that I could not protect them, and watch out for them anymore, and what was it giving me? You're right! Accute anxiety, and depression! I continue living with this, and working day by day to make it better. But when I seem to get to the point where I feel most comfortable, another situation comes along that would cause me anxiety. I have this horrendous anxiety, fear, and worry that my daughter will be at harms way, that she will get hurt bad, or even killed! I continously think about this. I try to make myself feel better by saying that she will be ok, but then the worry, fear, and the anxiety slowly creep in again and it starts all over!..It is something that has made me lose my sleep, I cannot focus at work, or day to day things. So what I ask of you is how do I combat this horrendous feeling of doom, worry, anxiety and fear? I have tried many times, but I don't know how to work on this to make it better! She will be leaving on Friday, and I don't know how I am going to deal with this!! What can I do? PLEASE HELP!! I want to wish her a safe return, but with all this negative thinking I am sooo afraid that I will attract the worse! For example, For her to be in harms way, to get hurt, or even possibly..I don't want to think about it!! PLEASE HELP! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!! :,-(
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