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Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 months. In the beginning we could never get enough of each other, we always had sex, even sexted while we were away! It wasn't until after I moved in about 3 months ago that it really slowed down. I wasn't sure why and I thought maybe he was just too tired, he was working too jobs. It wasn't until I tried using his phone to call mine because it was lost that the first thing that pulled up was porn. I opened his history and it was nothing but porn! I told my best friend about it because I was just so hurt. It made me feel useless and unwanted but she told me not to worry and that my boyfriend loves me. So I put it off but as time went on the sex became less and less. I always initiate it unless I hint at him that I would like it if he did. He watches porn every morning now when he wakes up he'll go in the bathroom and do it. I've even found by his history that he watches porn at work. I wouldn't mind that he watches porn sometimes if he gave me some attention too but he doesn't. He doesn't seem to want anything to do with me at times :( I already have horrible self esteem from my anxiety and depression but finding out that my boyfriend would rather watch these gorgeous sexy porn star models just rips my self esteem into little pieces... I just don't know what to do I feel so fat and ugly and useless like maybe hes not attracted to me anymore and that's why he won't touch me. Maybe our sex isn't pleasurable enough for him anymore. It honestly just hurts. I've tried talking to him about it and his excuse is he wants to shower before we do anything but he hardly ever showers before we have sex. I try to start things with him and dress up really sexy or even naked! But he'll just ignore me and shrug it off or kind of push me off him. Now I just ask him if we can have sex but he'll either ignore me, tell me later, or that he really just doesn't want to right now that he'd rather cuddle me which would be fine if I wasn't sooo sexually frustrated. I just don't know what to do, I love my boyfriend so much and I'm just so attracted to him it's hard not to want sex! He's very much eye candy lol leaving is not an option and I would never ever cheat on him. Please help, right now I'm kind of going on strike by making sure I'm never naked in front of him and im not going to initiate sex hoping he'll miss it. If anyone has any tips or examples that turned out good I'd love to hear. Some extra information, we are 3 years in age apart, no kids, and I'm on the depo birth control.

January 17, 2015 - 6:43pm

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