I'm a 23 year old girl. And lately I find that I've been moody - one minute I'll be happy and pleasant, the next unhappy or sad or irritable. And little things annoy or offend me quickly. I try to be more pleasant, but I don't know.... Why am I like this?
I'm wondering if it has to do with my current situation. I was a Law student but failed my first year on three attempts. After the second attempt, I didn't want to try a third time, but per my parents' wishes I tried a third time and failed. I barely studied because I was frustrated and had no motivation and I just wasted my time.... even though I didn't mean to. This my parents don't know. But I always felt guilty that my parents spent their money and it just washed down the drain. I'll be 24 in September and I'm still far from getting a Degree. I blame myself, I feel like I'm a burden. Instead of trying a fourth time, they decided I should pursue another Degree. So we're in the process of applying for me to do Graphic Design. My parents think that's right for me because I'm quiet and I like the computer and am creative and whatnot.
But they still think that I can do the Law. And I feel guilty that I'm doing something else. I mean, in High School I wanted to do Law. But when I failed a second time, I decided it wasn't for me. And now I'm confused, frustrated and feel like a burden on my parents. I'm withdrawn, I keep to myself mostly. And sometimes I just.... have thoughts like I want to die and I'm worthless and what's the point of living. I have no friends, no one to talk to and I'm just.... fed up and I hate this feeling. I don't know what to do :(