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Hi. I went on google and searched how to get over the fear of having sex for the first time and it led me to this site. I have been with my boyfriend for four years and I know that he is the man I want to marry. I feel like such a baby because we still haven't had sex because of me. I always prepare myself and tell myself it's not going to be that bad, but then as soon as we are about to I freak out and tighten up and then the mood is gone. I know that I want to have sex with him, but I just get so freaked out about how bad the pain will be. I probably have the lowest pain tolerance in the world so that is why I get so freaked out. I saw above that there is a question that asks if I've ever been sexually assaulted. I was molested at a very young age. Could that really be affecting me now? I just want to get past the fear of how bad it's going to hurt so I can move on with my life. If anyone has any words of wisdom or encouragement I would really appreciate it.