Wow! So many women trying to validate themselves with reasons to call other women sluts! It only goes to show the article is in fact correct! Some women clearly take delight in name-calling if they feel the other party deserves it. I would counter that if overly provocatively dressed women who are promiscuous in an unnecessarily overt way do in fact have the problems professed here, such as insecurities, STD's and the like, then they hardly need the sharp judgements and put-down's that other women seem so keen to assert. Some loving kindness might be a better approach for the 'slut', and the women who is so happy to deride someone so instantly based on her looks and behaviour at a given time. It always comes off as jealousy and insecurity on the behalf of the name-caller. Why would someone comfortable with their own appeal feel the need to put someone down with such a vile name? If these women do infact feel real pity at the sight of an overtly sexual woman, they would be less likely to call her a name than give some loving attention to her.
I believe that many of the women that responded to this article defending their rights to call other women sluts are insecure and have trouble containing their jealousy at another woman's sexuality, body, and the attention she attracts from men.
How do I know this? I've done it myself. I've felt threatened by women I've met who I perceived to be more sexy than myself, and have resorted to put-downs in a silly effort to elevate myself above the woman. But I'm hardly proud of it! As I continue to grow as an emotionally and spiritually mature woman, I choose to make myself aware of my uncomfortable feelings and behaviours, and strive to change my negative attitudes. It is NEVER helpful to put another person down or call them names, even if they truly are everything terrible you imagine. How on earth does it help anyone? I'm surprised women would defend the idea that calling certain women sluts is ok.
Being an attractive woman has garnered me much jealousy and judgement from other women, and I sense these kind of ladies the minute I enter a room, and avoid them like the plague. I believe they are the insecure ones with problems. I don't dress overtly sexily, and although married now, have only been in long-term relationships as a young adult. Nevertheless, just the ease I have with myself and other people is enough to have been called all sorts of terrible untrue things over the years . It's easy to sense when you're being judged negatively.
I think that the women who attest to vile name-calling need to have a look at themselves, and ask themselves what they get out of it. I know from the odd occasion I've succumbed to it that my honest partners have openly told me how unattractive they find the behaviour. Unfortunately it's always negative, and shows the insecurity of the name-caller.
Now for the rest of the article (the slut part was barely a chapter out of the many!), I wholeheartedly agree with the writer. It is so wonderful to finally be liberated of my earlier conceptions about how I should be sexually, to just fully be myself, and to have learned how to enjoy sex in a deep and connected way. For me, even though I consider my husband incredibly attractive, and our sex wonderful, an active imagination and fantasy life helps me 'let go' and soar into intense orgasms. Well, that and the freedom to touch myself during sex (without embarrassment) to bring things up a notch whenever I feel like it!
Needless to say, I've got a great sex-life, and my husband can't believe his luck being with someone who knows how to please herself, thus making things less confusing for him! And I don't need to feel threatened by other women that show 6 inches of cleavage in skin tight clothing and suggestive behaviour (next to my small breasts, and more modest attire). Being secure in your own sexuality and attractiveness - at least to one person - should make name-calling and put-downs a thing of the past.
Please women. Think about yourselves in an honest way. You're not fooling anyone.
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Wow! So many women trying to validate themselves with reasons to call other women sluts! It only goes to show the article is in fact correct! Some women clearly take delight in name-calling if they feel the other party deserves it. I would counter that if overly provocatively dressed women who are promiscuous in an unnecessarily overt way do in fact have the problems professed here, such as insecurities, STD's and the like, then they hardly need the sharp judgements and put-down's that other women seem so keen to assert. Some loving kindness might be a better approach for the 'slut', and the women who is so happy to deride someone so instantly based on her looks and behaviour at a given time. It always comes off as jealousy and insecurity on the behalf of the name-caller. Why would someone comfortable with their own appeal feel the need to put someone down with such a vile name? If these women do infact feel real pity at the sight of an overtly sexual woman, they would be less likely to call her a name than give some loving attention to her.
I believe that many of the women that responded to this article defending their rights to call other women sluts are insecure and have trouble containing their jealousy at another woman's sexuality, body, and the attention she attracts from men.
How do I know this? I've done it myself. I've felt threatened by women I've met who I perceived to be more sexy than myself, and have resorted to put-downs in a silly effort to elevate myself above the woman. But I'm hardly proud of it! As I continue to grow as an emotionally and spiritually mature woman, I choose to make myself aware of my uncomfortable feelings and behaviours, and strive to change my negative attitudes. It is NEVER helpful to put another person down or call them names, even if they truly are everything terrible you imagine. How on earth does it help anyone? I'm surprised women would defend the idea that calling certain women sluts is ok.
Being an attractive woman has garnered me much jealousy and judgement from other women, and I sense these kind of ladies the minute I enter a room, and avoid them like the plague. I believe they are the insecure ones with problems. I don't dress overtly sexily, and although married now, have only been in long-term relationships as a young adult. Nevertheless, just the ease I have with myself and other people is enough to have been called all sorts of terrible untrue things over the years . It's easy to sense when you're being judged negatively.
I think that the women who attest to vile name-calling need to have a look at themselves, and ask themselves what they get out of it. I know from the odd occasion I've succumbed to it that my honest partners have openly told me how unattractive they find the behaviour. Unfortunately it's always negative, and shows the insecurity of the name-caller.
Now for the rest of the article (the slut part was barely a chapter out of the many!), I wholeheartedly agree with the writer. It is so wonderful to finally be liberated of my earlier conceptions about how I should be sexually, to just fully be myself, and to have learned how to enjoy sex in a deep and connected way. For me, even though I consider my husband incredibly attractive, and our sex wonderful, an active imagination and fantasy life helps me 'let go' and soar into intense orgasms. Well, that and the freedom to touch myself during sex (without embarrassment) to bring things up a notch whenever I feel like it!
Needless to say, I've got a great sex-life, and my husband can't believe his luck being with someone who knows how to please herself, thus making things less confusing for him! And I don't need to feel threatened by other women that show 6 inches of cleavage in skin tight clothing and suggestive behaviour (next to my small breasts, and more modest attire). Being secure in your own sexuality and attractiveness - at least to one person - should make name-calling and put-downs a thing of the past.
Please women. Think about yourselves in an honest way. You're not fooling anyone.
August 4, 2009 - 2:04pmThis Comment
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