This thread has left me in tears. I am a 44 yo mother of three, aged 4,2 and 1. I have just found out my very good friend age 40 (mother of three, aged 5,3,and 1) is pregnant again (not planned) with No.4 . I am feeling SO emotional at the thought that I will not be having another baby too.
All my pregnancies were good , the last two had diet controlled gestational diabetes... the probable cause is a family history of big babies on both sides. Mine were 9lb 15, 10lb 2 and 10lb exactly. Partly due to my age and partly due to baby size I had 3 ceasars, but only the last one was elective. With my sensible head on i made a decision to have my tubes cut during the last ceasar...with my partners full agreement. My age (he is 11 years younger) and the fact we had been lucky to have 3 healthy and happy children were our principle deciding factors.
I never imagined i would feel envious and SO long for another child. My friend's pregnancy has prompted me to think thoughts I never thought i would have. Motherhood has been a great and unexpected boon to my life, and i am grateful that have the opportunity to experience it.
If I were miraculously to fall pregnant, although aghast, i would be ecstatic, but would be very concerned about all the associated risks, especially with my pregnancy and delivery history. I would not opt for screening except ultrasound. We decided with all our preganacies to have no addtional screening simply for the reason that the figures are PURELY percentages and at the end of the day neither of us would be able to decide to terminate on a figure. Also there are so many common abnormalites that CANNOT be screened for . Amnioncentesis and CV sampling were also not an option for us because of the risk of foetal abnormality and miscarriage.
There is such a conflict in me between the emotional urge to be pregnant again ( I loved every minute of being pregnant) and having No.4, and the practical and real physical risks that I would be exposed to , should I be pregnant again at 44+. Would it be fair to put myself in real danger, and to put my children and partner through the stress and worry? Am i being selfish yearning for another pregnancy?
I don't think 45 is too old to be pregnant, but I do think you need to question your motivation and really consider all the risk factors before you come to your decision.......and yes , I think i would take the risk if i hadn't had my tubes cut!
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This thread has left me in tears. I am a 44 yo mother of three, aged 4,2 and 1. I have just found out my very good friend age 40 (mother of three, aged 5,3,and 1) is pregnant again (not planned) with No.4 . I am feeling SO emotional at the thought that I will not be having another baby too.
All my pregnancies were good , the last two had diet controlled gestational diabetes... the probable cause is a family history of big babies on both sides. Mine were 9lb 15, 10lb 2 and 10lb exactly. Partly due to my age and partly due to baby size I had 3 ceasars, but only the last one was elective. With my sensible head on i made a decision to have my tubes cut during the last ceasar...with my partners full agreement. My age (he is 11 years younger) and the fact we had been lucky to have 3 healthy and happy children were our principle deciding factors.
I never imagined i would feel envious and SO long for another child. My friend's pregnancy has prompted me to think thoughts I never thought i would have. Motherhood has been a great and unexpected boon to my life, and i am grateful that have the opportunity to experience it.
If I were miraculously to fall pregnant, although aghast, i would be ecstatic, but would be very concerned about all the associated risks, especially with my pregnancy and delivery history. I would not opt for screening except ultrasound. We decided with all our preganacies to have no addtional screening simply for the reason that the figures are PURELY percentages and at the end of the day neither of us would be able to decide to terminate on a figure. Also there are so many common abnormalites that CANNOT be screened for . Amnioncentesis and CV sampling were also not an option for us because of the risk of foetal abnormality and miscarriage.
There is such a conflict in me between the emotional urge to be pregnant again ( I loved every minute of being pregnant) and having No.4, and the practical and real physical risks that I would be exposed to , should I be pregnant again at 44+. Would it be fair to put myself in real danger, and to put my children and partner through the stress and worry? Am i being selfish yearning for another pregnancy?
I don't think 45 is too old to be pregnant, but I do think you need to question your motivation and really consider all the risk factors before you come to your decision.......and yes , I think i would take the risk if i hadn't had my tubes cut!
October 15, 2011 - 1:46pmThis Comment
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