i am new tot his web site so bear with me.
I am 25 years old. i am married just over a year, and i my husband hates to touch me. I know its my fault. I dont look really good, and i know he likes wowen who are thin. i am not fat, i have always had big breasts and bum. but i am not fat. i know men like me as i always get attention from men. Men even tell my husband how lucky he is to have someone like me. i have changed my life for this man, my religion, i left my family, friends, school, and my place for him. as i loved him. i mean i still love very much but its like its as if he hates to have sex with me, he hates to touch me. i can just feel it. i still remember the first time we had sex, after he said ,why are you all sweat. i felt so embarrassed. that was the day i should have learnt. even when we were dating, he never used to touch me, i persumed it was because he was religious. but after we married, things got worse. i am in a situation where by her never touches me, never has sex with me. and if he does touch me, i know its only because he feels he needs to or because he knows i want sex. his biggest fear is that i will leave him, as i has a brief affair as he never showed me affection or love and i was craving it so bad, thats why i went to another man. so tahst why he gives me sex, as he is afraid i will go with someone else. but i never will and i assured him of it. and he knows how much i love him. its me who is suffering from the lack of affection or lack of touch or just hearing the word i love . I dont know how to talk to him about it. he is not the kind of man who communiactes well. its as if he just cant. so now he sleeps, and always says i dont feel well at night before we sleep, i know he really means dont try to have sex with me. and sometimes i am so scared to talk as i am afraid he will tell me something like, oh is sex everything?or are you obsessed with sex? and i know that will be the day when i walk out the door and never come back. i love him so much and i dont want my marriage to end. i want him to want sex with me. i know i satify him in bed. and he satifys me when we do have sex, but maybe, its because i am not thin and he doesnt like to touch me. now i feel like i am sleeping alone and beside a stranger while in bed. please someone give me advice. i just dont know how to take the next step. or do i just except it that my life should be with a man who doesnt want sex.please someone give me advice as i am only 25