Hi Alysiak,
As a former smoker, who quit cold turkey after a serious smoking addiction, I am afraid to say, that in my opinion, unless someone wants to quit, there is nothing anyone can say or do that will make them.
I think that unless you threaten to leave him, he probably will not quit, because the desire has to come from within. I am sorry...I know that this is hard to hear, but I feel very strongly that it is true. I feel so strongly about this that I would NEVER date a smoker again and I would never take even one puff of a cigarette again myself...that is the hold these evil sticks of tobacco and chemicals have on people.
When I smoked, I was defensive about it, I wanted people who smoked to stay smoking, if someone quit, I was disappointed!
My mother still smokes(about two a day) and she will not even listen if anyone tells her how bad they are, she doesn't even really believe that they are!Addiction is a scary thing.
I hope that your husband wakes up one day and realizes that smoking is bad and evil and kills, but he may not.....if he does, it will be because he decided it for himself. Smokers who love smoking don't really listen, sadly.
It's especially poignant in your husband's case as he saw his mother and friend suffering and dying from lung cancer. And if that won't stop him, a pamphlet certainly won't. It's denial.
Unfortunately, it really comes down to you deciding if you can live with someone who smokes. It's so hard when you love someone and they do something that is bad for them but won't stop. I feel for you.
Maybe someone else has a story of the influence of a loved one making them quit smoking???
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Hi Alysiak,
February 16, 2009 - 10:25pmAs a former smoker, who quit cold turkey after a serious smoking addiction, I am afraid to say, that in my opinion, unless someone wants to quit, there is nothing anyone can say or do that will make them.
I think that unless you threaten to leave him, he probably will not quit, because the desire has to come from within. I am sorry...I know that this is hard to hear, but I feel very strongly that it is true. I feel so strongly about this that I would NEVER date a smoker again and I would never take even one puff of a cigarette again myself...that is the hold these evil sticks of tobacco and chemicals have on people.
When I smoked, I was defensive about it, I wanted people who smoked to stay smoking, if someone quit, I was disappointed!
My mother still smokes(about two a day) and she will not even listen if anyone tells her how bad they are, she doesn't even really believe that they are!Addiction is a scary thing.
I hope that your husband wakes up one day and realizes that smoking is bad and evil and kills, but he may not.....if he does, it will be because he decided it for himself. Smokers who love smoking don't really listen, sadly.
It's especially poignant in your husband's case as he saw his mother and friend suffering and dying from lung cancer. And if that won't stop him, a pamphlet certainly won't. It's denial.
Unfortunately, it really comes down to you deciding if you can live with someone who smokes. It's so hard when you love someone and they do something that is bad for them but won't stop. I feel for you.
Maybe someone else has a story of the influence of a loved one making them quit smoking???
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