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I have to be honest, I'm a smoker of 20yrs, 35yrs old,father of 2, happily married & have a 70yr old mother who is Still smoking since she is 11. I am stopping this cold turkey or I should say because I have Pneumonia from a normal chest infection that most could manage but not us lengthy smokers! My Grandmother, Moms mom... Died of Ephasema at 55. She died due to a silly cold or chest infection & I Fucking KILLED HER! All the things in my Life that should make me wanna or I should feel responsible for quitting don't! Kids, family, LIVING, these should make people say: I Am Human in simply put - ingesting smoke into your lungs like when your house burning down & you crawl cause of FUCKING SMOKE!?!?!?! But every day, 20 times a day I put a small fire with my kids, wife, family, house, cars, ect. RIGHT IN MY MOUTH! DIDN'T STOP ME! Had other chest colds, not Pneumonia, but felt shitty enough to say I would quit but just slowed down for a few days to a week. I've talked the talk about quitting for this or that day, holiday, New years, Birthday, ect... In fact, this past February was my 35th birthday & I had 'that talk' with myself that 'this was the End' & EVEN Looked my 7yr old in the Eyes & said I Love You! I'm Quitting!!!! FAILED & Ashamed! Now approx. 1 month after that day in Feb where I talked with myself stating I'm Done but knowing how Flimsy the Statement Truly Was, I Sit here 7 FULL DAYS OF NOT SMOKING & IT IS LIBERATING TO KNOW HOW STRONG I TRULY AM!!! FUCK CIGARETTES & ALL THOSE YEARS OF TORTURE, LIES, SCANDAL, WASTED MONEY THEY'VE CAUSE ME!!!!!! Do you all know why I've stopped smokin Cigarettes??? It's My Mom!!!!! Smoking almost 60yrs, raised 4 children on her own, worked her Blessed heals off All her God Given Days to better herself FOR ME!!! Her child!! There's Something that has just clicked for me.... Maybe if I make a deal with the MAN ABOVE He'll Grace My Mother with a peacefully remaining on this Earth for as many years as he body can provide! I gave him my Promise for his! Im not a deeply religious man but feel there has got to be someone to take of my mother when I Can't! She is turning 71 in May & strong like bull but we know how the circle of life goes.... This Is My Statement of how I stopped Smoking & why... Hope it Helps Some, I know it has Me! I Love You Mom & I Cannot imagine a day you are not here! Clayt(LiL Guy)

March 25, 2012 - 8:28pm


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