I need to tell someone how bad I feel. Your situation is very similar to mine. I am 37 years old, my husband is 41. I have been disabled since 1998. I have been in 2 car accidents that were not my fault. I have Fibromyalgia, cervical and lumbar degeneration, nerve damage to my spine and back, chronic pain, female medical problems, insulin resistance, metabolic syndrome,and too much more to list. My husband has Gastroparesis, which is paralyzed intestines and stomach. This caused severe Diabetes. His blood sugar levels go over 600 many times, it should be between 70-99 on an emoty stomach. He also has Barrett's esophagus, lung problems and more. He worked before he became ill, and I stayed home and cooked, cleaned, took care of his daughter, laundry, work clothes, and also rescued and cared for abused animals. Also, went through years of hell w/his x-wife and court battles and her just plain evil ways. I pushed myself and always push myself constantly through so much. I have had 3 miscarriages, but by the grace of God have my Baby now. My baby is my life! My blood relatives have no use for me or my husband and even my baby. Because my mother helped me out financially b/c we are both disabled, they are worried about their inheritance. My mother and brother have really done a lot to hurt me, unforgivable things, they are not even sorry and get mad if I am upset. My mother didn't want to hear about how hurt I am about the other siblings disowning me and literally walked out while I was going to cry. She says she is tired if hearing about it! My mother told me also to not call her anymore. I have no family and my friends I had were lost b/c of shenanigans my mother and brother pulled. I am all alone with every responsibility from my children, animals,financial worries b/c we are both disabled, cleaning house, cooking, I have to hold down the fort. My husband does not seem to understand w/my injuries, I can not do EVERYTHING like I am doing. He also complains about not being able to get better b/c of the doctors which is true, they don't know what to do, but he won't find other doctors. He doesn't check his blood sugar like he should b/c he feels since the insulin he has to take is so high& his paralyzed stomach won't absorb it, and he will still be sick, why do it? He can take over 250 ccs a day of insulin and not get right. Insurance won't pay for him to go into a nursing home to get 24/7 care and regulated to later get an insulin pump like the Endocrinologist wanted. I understand how sick he is and frustrated over the system, but I am sick too. I am overworked, depressed, isolated, and in terrible pain. I can't even go to my Doctor's b/c I am doing everything else. I am miserable. He does try to do some things, but not hardly ever any work, work,dirty jobs. He fusses at me all of the time and swears it's me doing it. He passes out in the middle of talking to me, if he does talk to me, b/c he is always too sick to talk. I am so lonely, I have no friends or family, I am so emotionally hurt by them and now him. I want to have more children, but we don't even get along to do that. I am stuck. I am going to be 38 years old and I can't waste my childbearing years on a marriage that is so unbearable at times. I don't want to leave him, especially b/c of my baby's sake. I don't want her being shifted back and forth. He thinks he should get 50/50 custody, but he is not able to do that w/his conditions. At least even w/ all of my problems, I can care for my baby very well. I am so distruaght! My Father is the only one that could help me and he passed away in 1995. He was my angel, my rock, the family picked on me constantly b/c I am the youngest of 4 children, 17, 15, 14 years difference in age from me. I came along 14 yrs later. My Dad would always tell them to leave me alone, he defended me during fights w/my mother. He was always honest and fair, and right was right and wrong was just plain wrong, no matter who you were. I miss him so much and I don't know what to do anymore! My Rock is gone, my best friend, is gone, the best Daddy in the world is gone! And everyone, family,husband, is against me. My husband used to help me w/ my family. He became my rock, but that's gone, he gets so irritated w/me, and I think he should be darn glad I do everything I do! I am just really alone. I have my Baby, who I breathe for, and my children in fur. My step-daughter is there sometimes, but is a teenager who has been brainwashed by her mom who abandoned her and her sibling from another marriage, for a different man & left the state. So, she has her own issues. I try to mother her and help her as much as I can, but she has learned how to cut off feelings and not deal w/pain. So, her I am, drenched face from sobbing, missing my Dad so terribly and feeling abandoned myself by my mother and siblings. What can I do, can someone help me?? I don't even have a friend. Never did I ever think my life would turn out this way. The one blessing I really do have is my baby, but she will have no Grandpa who would have loved her more than life itself alive, or my husband's father who passed away(wonderful man, God Bless Him), and my husband's mother, who had a heart as pure as gold and so much love to give, she passed away(all very young), and no family ALIVE on my side is worth it or even cares about my baby. I have no family to share her with. I know you have your own problems, but I need someone to talk to, could you maybe even post this, I am learning when I can about all of this new technology.
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I need to tell someone how bad I feel. Your situation is very similar to mine. I am 37 years old, my husband is 41. I have been disabled since 1998. I have been in 2 car accidents that were not my fault. I have Fibromyalgia, cervical and lumbar degeneration, nerve damage to my spine and back, chronic pain, female medical problems, insulin resistance, metabolic syndrome,and too much more to list. My husband has Gastroparesis, which is paralyzed intestines and stomach. This caused severe Diabetes. His blood sugar levels go over 600 many times, it should be between 70-99 on an emoty stomach. He also has Barrett's esophagus, lung problems and more. He worked before he became ill, and I stayed home and cooked, cleaned, took care of his daughter, laundry, work clothes, and also rescued and cared for abused animals. Also, went through years of hell w/his x-wife and court battles and her just plain evil ways. I pushed myself and always push myself constantly through so much. I have had 3 miscarriages, but by the grace of God have my Baby now. My baby is my life! My blood relatives have no use for me or my husband and even my baby. Because my mother helped me out financially b/c we are both disabled, they are worried about their inheritance. My mother and brother have really done a lot to hurt me, unforgivable things, they are not even sorry and get mad if I am upset. My mother didn't want to hear about how hurt I am about the other siblings disowning me and literally walked out while I was going to cry. She says she is tired if hearing about it! My mother told me also to not call her anymore. I have no family and my friends I had were lost b/c of shenanigans my mother and brother pulled. I am all alone with every responsibility from my children, animals,financial worries b/c we are both disabled, cleaning house, cooking, I have to hold down the fort. My husband does not seem to understand w/my injuries, I can not do EVERYTHING like I am doing. He also complains about not being able to get better b/c of the doctors which is true, they don't know what to do, but he won't find other doctors. He doesn't check his blood sugar like he should b/c he feels since the insulin he has to take is so high& his paralyzed stomach won't absorb it, and he will still be sick, why do it? He can take over 250 ccs a day of insulin and not get right. Insurance won't pay for him to go into a nursing home to get 24/7 care and regulated to later get an insulin pump like the Endocrinologist wanted. I understand how sick he is and frustrated over the system, but I am sick too. I am overworked, depressed, isolated, and in terrible pain. I can't even go to my Doctor's b/c I am doing everything else. I am miserable. He does try to do some things, but not hardly ever any work, work,dirty jobs. He fusses at me all of the time and swears it's me doing it. He passes out in the middle of talking to me, if he does talk to me, b/c he is always too sick to talk. I am so lonely, I have no friends or family, I am so emotionally hurt by them and now him. I want to have more children, but we don't even get along to do that. I am stuck. I am going to be 38 years old and I can't waste my childbearing years on a marriage that is so unbearable at times. I don't want to leave him, especially b/c of my baby's sake. I don't want her being shifted back and forth. He thinks he should get 50/50 custody, but he is not able to do that w/his conditions. At least even w/ all of my problems, I can care for my baby very well. I am so distruaght! My Father is the only one that could help me and he passed away in 1995. He was my angel, my rock, the family picked on me constantly b/c I am the youngest of 4 children, 17, 15, 14 years difference in age from me. I came along 14 yrs later. My Dad would always tell them to leave me alone, he defended me during fights w/my mother. He was always honest and fair, and right was right and wrong was just plain wrong, no matter who you were. I miss him so much and I don't know what to do anymore! My Rock is gone, my best friend, is gone, the best Daddy in the world is gone! And everyone, family,husband, is against me. My husband used to help me w/ my family. He became my rock, but that's gone, he gets so irritated w/me, and I think he should be darn glad I do everything I do! I am just really alone. I have my Baby, who I breathe for, and my children in fur. My step-daughter is there sometimes, but is a teenager who has been brainwashed by her mom who abandoned her and her sibling from another marriage, for a different man & left the state. So, she has her own issues. I try to mother her and help her as much as I can, but she has learned how to cut off feelings and not deal w/pain. So, her I am, drenched face from sobbing, missing my Dad so terribly and feeling abandoned myself by my mother and siblings. What can I do, can someone help me?? I don't even have a friend. Never did I ever think my life would turn out this way. The one blessing I really do have is my baby, but she will have no Grandpa who would have loved her more than life itself alive, or my husband's father who passed away(wonderful man, God Bless Him), and my husband's mother, who had a heart as pure as gold and so much love to give, she passed away(all very young), and no family ALIVE on my side is worth it or even cares about my baby. I have no family to share her with. I know you have your own problems, but I need someone to talk to, could you maybe even post this, I am learning when I can about all of this new technology.
March 18, 2011 - 12:09amThis Comment
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