The kind of woman who leaves a sick spouse is someone who is at her wits end. My husband was diagnosed with MS when we were engaged. We were married for 16 years, however, I didn't bargain for the controlling, lying (he calls it fibbing), manipulative, competitive streak that this nasty disease brought out in him. Life became so intolerable that I was confined to my room. One of the reasons for leaving in the end was because my chronic back pain which has left me semi-disabled following child birth (his child) became in my husband's eyes irrelevant. I would ask him each and every day how he was feeling, however, this would not be reciprocated. If my husband had a relapse I would wait on him hand and foot, however, whenever I was ill or suffered back pain he would simply leave me in my room and not make enquiries - I wouldn't even get a cup of tea.
The second and perhaps more important reason was that my teenage daughter became mentally ill from the dreadful situation and atmosphere between us in and around the house. My focus became my daughter who spends half her time with her dad and half with me (her choice - she is 15 years old). My daughter is on prozac but is slowly but surely getting better. My husband and I (still married) are more tolerant of each other right now and better friends than before. Whilst we were both together and in such terrible circumstances we could not help each other, however, now we are there for each other when it matters. Grant it, me more than him but I can handle it with distance between us when needed.
I still love my husband (at least the man I married) and I long to see the person he used to be. I pray for a cure for MS so that one day he may eventually return. This heartbreaking disease puts a juggernaut through your life. For those of you who think women who leave a man with MS I ask you to walk a mile in my footsteps before you judge.
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The kind of woman who leaves a sick spouse is someone who is at her wits end. My husband was diagnosed with MS when we were engaged. We were married for 16 years, however, I didn't bargain for the controlling, lying (he calls it fibbing), manipulative, competitive streak that this nasty disease brought out in him. Life became so intolerable that I was confined to my room. One of the reasons for leaving in the end was because my chronic back pain which has left me semi-disabled following child birth (his child) became in my husband's eyes irrelevant. I would ask him each and every day how he was feeling, however, this would not be reciprocated. If my husband had a relapse I would wait on him hand and foot, however, whenever I was ill or suffered back pain he would simply leave me in my room and not make enquiries - I wouldn't even get a cup of tea.
The second and perhaps more important reason was that my teenage daughter became mentally ill from the dreadful situation and atmosphere between us in and around the house. My focus became my daughter who spends half her time with her dad and half with me (her choice - she is 15 years old). My daughter is on prozac but is slowly but surely getting better. My husband and I (still married) are more tolerant of each other right now and better friends than before. Whilst we were both together and in such terrible circumstances we could not help each other, however, now we are there for each other when it matters. Grant it, me more than him but I can handle it with distance between us when needed.
I still love my husband (at least the man I married) and I long to see the person he used to be. I pray for a cure for MS so that one day he may eventually return. This heartbreaking disease puts a juggernaut through your life. For those of you who think women who leave a man with MS I ask you to walk a mile in my footsteps before you judge.
July 6, 2016 - 10:50amThis Comment
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